What It Means To Be A Parent
Fact: No parent likes to be told how to raise their children. Fact: Every parent needs to be told how to raise their children. Too bad most of us won’t accept this notion, but I assume you will for why else would you take the time to read this and learn? We go to school for 12 plus years to do what? To learn. Why? Because you must learn before you can do. So, here goes the million dollar question, who taught you how to parent?
Let’s see if we can agree upon something here. Nobody is perfect. Nobody has all the answers. Nobody has the exact formula and stratagem for guaranteeing all desired results for everyday. No one always gets it right and this is why we tend to not listen to others for parenting advice. We don’t even listen to our own parents half the time. So, if we look at ourselves from an objective view, wouldn’t it be safe to say that what we know personally about raising children is far from perfect? I don’t need for you to answer that question for me for we all know the answer.
You most likely know very little past what your parents knew about parenting and I guarantee you they could have done better. Sure, they did the best they could with what they had, but it still could have been better. When it comes to my parents, I accept what they have done for me and my brothers and sister as well as for themselves because I know that they didn’t have the internet growing up. Did I have a bad life? Not at all, I just know it could have been better. More importantly, I know they could have taught me more only if they had access to the knowledge. Well, now we all have access to this oceanic tank of information. The words, the stories, and the data is all here. The accounts, the records, and the transcripts are available to billion around the world. All we have to do is take time to absorb it.
Treat people the way you would want to be treated. I think that goes for our kids too. Treat your kids in the manner of which you would have loved for your parents to treat you. Not only on a respect and loving level, but on a financial and legacy level as well.
The amount of money you make and accumulate does not happen by accident. It is a direct result of your perceived value to the market. But most parents don’t act in accordance to this. They operate as if they had no say so in the matter. Many pretend that they are a victim to the hourly wage that they receive. As if there is no higher paying jobs or access to any higher income generating processes. Obviously, there is a wide array of opportunities that one could travel down to create a revenue stream that far exceeds the average and yet we typically don’t engage in them. Why? Because we weren’t taught to do so.
This is our chance to break the mold. To start a new trend and present a new tradition. Whether that has to deal with money, success, or even discipline. Though I believe that one should defend themselves violently if the situation calls for it, I still believe violence is always a last resort. I follow the same philosophy when it comes to guiding my son. 99% of the time, I don’t believe there is any reason to physically discipline my son. I haven’t found that 1% so far and hopefully I never will for I feel that if I did it probably wouldn’t be justified. Most likely it would have been because I failed him as a parent, and when you take that perspective it becomes almost impossible to ever allow yourself to step into such territory. That’s not how my father approached things when I was growing up, but I have the power to rewrite the script.
Our jobs as parents is to guide, protect, and support our children. Maybe you didn’t receive the type of support I’m preaching about. Maybe you weren’t protected in the way we all hoped to be. Maybe your “guide” was lost themselves. I can empathize with you, but it does not change your responsibility. You have an obligation to learn, if you don’t already know, how to be the ultimate parent. A parent that’s understanding, yet teaches strong principles. A parent that’s loving, yet stern in their convictions. A parent that is grateful, yet spends their energy building great wealth. A parent that is humble, yet an inspiration to all parents and children. You have an obligation to be your child’s biggest hero, yet you push to make their own way in the world. We have a debt to pay to our children for we have forced life upon them without their permission.
You don’t have to read parenting books in order to be a successful parent. In fact, I would recommend that you stay away from those type of books. They won’t teach you powerful life skills. Parenting is not about parenting, it’s about economics, investments, relationships, companionship, networking, communication, nutrition, fitness, love, discipline, work ethic, patience, history, statistics, creativity, logic, judgement, emotional intelligence and skill development. Parenting books don’t cover that, especially not in great detail. You need to immerse yourself into the works of experts who are considered the top in their field. You don’t have to become an expert yourself, but with a enough specific knowledge from different fields you can become an expert parent.
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Mel Jones the BEAST